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Relocations
Programe >> Moving to India >> Expat Kids |
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| Relocating Kids |
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Successfully
relocating kids internationally can be as
much an attitude of mind as it is practical
logistics. |
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Getting the practical
aspects of the move to go smoothly and calmly
is important in helping children make the
necessary adjustments. Planning the shipment
of personal belongings and pets, the leaving
of one home, traveling to a new country and
then settling into a new home, country and
school are separate issues whose individual
aspects must be addressed from a child's point
of view. |
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Children can form negative
perceptions of any part of a move, not just
from what they hear from their parents and
friends, but from what they do not hear. |
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Common concerns children
have about an international move can be : |
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They will
be left behind (either at home or abroad)
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Their toys and personal
possessions will be left behind and/or thrown
away |
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They will never go back
home |
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They will never see their
friends and relatives again |
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They will not have anywhere
to live once they move abroad |
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They will not be able
to attend school abroad |
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They will not have any
friends in the destination country |
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They will not be able
to eat their favorite foods whilst abroad |
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No one will speak their
language in the destination country |
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Involving
the children in the processes of moving
can go a long way to relieving some of these
concerns and explaining to them what is
happening and going to happen can relive
others. |
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When parents presents
a positive, but realistic, attitude towards
a move, children will feel much happier too;
they can easily pick up and adopt their parent's
negative attitudes. |
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The practical aspects
of moving that directly affect children are
discussed below. Addressing each, in consideration
of an individual child's needs, will help
them relocate successfully. |
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| Shipping |
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Shipping as
many of a child's personal possessions as
possible will help them settle quickly into
their new home by providing them with familiar
objects and toys with which to personalize
their new room. Providing personal photos
and photo albums for children can also be
helpful for reassuring them that their friends
and relatives are not gone and forgotten. |
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When children can see
their belongings being packed and placed in
the lorry, they can more readily accept they
will see them again. If they have also seen
a removal lorry delivering a shipment to a
neighbor’s house they can be more confident
that the lorry with their shipment will do
the same too. |
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| Leaving and Closure |
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Saying goodbye
is important for children. They need to know
that friends and relatives will not forget
them, and are waiting for them to return,
either for visits or permanently. |
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It might be painful at
the time of the good-byes, but in the long
run it can leave children more comfortable
with the thought of being away from home. |
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| Traveling |
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If it is necessary
to fly to the destination, tips to help families
do so can be found in our section Flying with
Kids. |
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| Arriving and
Settling-In |
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Children need
to feel secure and confident in the new environment
before they can fully appreciate and enjoy
the new country. |
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The first few days, or
even weeks, is not the time to insist an older
child venture out into a new city and country
alone. |
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Younger children may not
sleep well and can suffer from separation
anxiety. Because so much of what they know
has changed, it can take them some time to
understand that further changes are not going
to happen too. |
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If you moved from rural
Scotland to downtown Edinburgh it would take
your child a while to settle, and a move from
London to Berlin will be much the same for
a child. |
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Providing a child with
a secure and comfortable base, from which
to explore their new surroundings, is an excellent
place to start the settling-in process. |
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Begin by making their
room comfortable and familiar. Arrange toys,
books, pictures and beds so they feel 'at
home'. A child that sleeps well at night is
going to be much happier than a tired grumpy
one. |
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Once the new home feels
comfortable, the local area can be investigated
with the knowledge that the safety of home
can be returned to. This confidence booster
will also make it easier for a child to integrate
with other expat children and invite them
to their home. |
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Schooling
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For expat
parents, the decision on whether primary
childcare of pre-school children will be
done by a parent, domestic employee or day-care
centre is made harder by the addition of
factors that really only occur when the
family is abroad. |
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If one parent has fulfilled
the primary childcare role before the move,
they may be happy to continue doing so afterwards.
However, in some countries it is not common
practice for expat parents to do this as most
families employ full-time domestic staff.
In these circumstances it can be difficult
for an expat caregiver to integrate into the
group of caregivers because of language difficulties,
or because the caregivers perceive the expat
to have a different social status and thus
remain detached. |
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Other expats, who employ
full-time staff, may also not 'approve' of
an expat who looks after their own children,
which can make it difficult for the care giving
expat to mix with other expats during the
day. |
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When both parents have
worked before the move, it can difficult for
one to adjust to staying at home and assuming
full-time childcare duties. If expat childcare
in the host country is also commonly carried
out by domestic staff, there may also be the
problems discussed above. |
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When considering the employment
of domestic staff for childcare duties, expat
parents need to consider how they will communicate
with the caregiver, what language the caregiver
will use with child, as well as the cultural
attitudes of the caregiver towards diet, health/safety,
behavior and discipline. |
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If the family is planning
to stay in the country for an extended period
of time, a local caregiver can instill knowledge
of the language from an early age and the
child is likely to grow up bi-lingual, though
if both parents work long hours the child's
native language ability may suffer. |
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Cultural attitudes towards
childcare vary enormously and in some countries
expat parents need to be firm in laying down
ground rules with an employed caregiver. Areas
of concern can be the provision of acceptable
activities for the child, when it is safe
for the child to go outside (in some countries
children are never taken outside to play during
the winter), television viewing and diet. |
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The availability of day-care
facilities varies from country to country,
as does the quality. They also split into
two general categories; local and international. |
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Local facilities will
usually use the local language and most of
the staff and children will be local nationals.
An expat child in such a centre will be immersed
in the local language and culture. |
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International facilities
usually use English as the medium of instruction
and can be of a standard and quality comparable
to the best in Europe or North America. Some
staff may be native English speakers, though
there will probably be local staff too. Local
children are often enrolled in such facilities,
by parents anxious for their children to grow
up bi-lingual. |
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Whether the centre is
local or international, expat parents should
take care to find out as much as possible
before enrolling their children. A meeting
with staff and a visit during school hours
is important, as is talking to parents of
children who have attended the centre. |
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Most expat children attend
what are commonly referred to as international
schools. These have been set up to provide
quality education, in English, to children
of many nationalities. |
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Within the broad umbrella
of international schools are 'American', 'British'
and 'International' curriculum schools. |
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At elementary and middle
school level, there is not much to choose
between them in terms of curriculum and teaching
style. At high school level the curriculae
vary greatly. |
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American curriculum schools
aim towards Standardized Assessment Tests
(SATs) and Advanced Placement (AP) courses.
These are the most common exams used to assess
students for entry to American universities.
At high school level students usually study
a broad range of subjects until they graduate.
For students who are likely to transfer back
to America, or another American overseas school,
accreditation by one of the US agencies or
the European Council of International Schools
(ECIS) can be important. |
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British curriculum schools
generally follow the British National Curriculum
and students study for the GCSE and Advanced
('A') Level examinations. Accreditation is
not seen as so important by many of these
schools, though they can be among the best
of the international schools. Students generally
study at least 8 GCSEs and 3 or 4 'A' levels. |
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In many countries there
are also German, French, Pakistani and other
nationality schools, sponsored by governments
and organizations, which provide the standard
education of that country. |
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International curriculum
schools are usually members of the International
Baccalaureate Organization (IBO), based in
Switzerland. IB school may follow any, or
all, of the Primary Years, Middle Years, or
Diploma programs. Many also offer IGCSE courses
(the international version of the GCSE exams).
The IB Diploma program is a demanding multidisciplinary
course that can be taught in English, French
or Spanish, though most use English. The IB
diploma is widely recognized for entry to
universities around the world. |
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Local schools are another
option for expat children, though parents
should consider difficulties that the language
of instruction and the content of the curriculum
may pose for their child. For younger children
a local school can be a good way for them
to learn the local language. |
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Whichever school is chosen,
the suitability of the school, both socially
and academically, for the child should be
considered. Also important to consider is
where the child will go when they leave the
school (another school, university, etc.)
and whether the curriculum will help or hinder
that future move. |
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To determine the quality
of a school, parents should ask as many questions
as possible of the school, parents of children
who have attended it and expat staff at their
embassy. |
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To find an international
school in your destination country, see our
directory below : |
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American Embassy School
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| Chandragupta
Marg, Chanakyapuri, New Delhi, 110 021, India |
| Tel
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(+91) 11 2611
7140 |
| Fax : |
(+91) 11 2687 3320 |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
3-18 |
| Total Enrolment: |
971; 511 boys, 460 girls |
| FEES : |
Day only -US$ 4800-US$
13150 |
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| American International
School Chennai |
| 17 Murray's
Gate Road, Alwarpet, Chennai (Madras), 600
018, India |
| Tel
: |
(+91) 44 2499
0881 |
| Fax : |
(+91) 44 2466 0636 |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
3-18 |
| Total Enrolment: |
201; 105 boys, 96 girls |
| Nationalities: |
18 |
| Pre-School: |
15 |
| Elementary
(K-5): |
100 |
| Middle School
(gr 6-8): |
54 |
| High School
(gr 9-12): |
32 |
| Fees: |
Day only -US$ 2950-US$
13500 |
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| American School
of Bombay |
| C/o AmConGen,
Department of State, Washington, DC, 20521-6240,
USA |
| Tel
: |
(+91) 22 22652
1837 |
| Fax : |
(+91) 22 22652 1838 |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
3-19 |
| Total Enrolment: |
306; 157 boys, 149 girls |
| Nationalities: |
33 |
| Elementary: |
169 |
| Middle School: |
61 |
| High School: |
76 |
| Fees: |
Day only: US$ 3208-US$
17208 |
| Other
Fees: |
FEES: |
Registration US$1,000;
Capital levy Pre-K
US$10,000; Capital levy K-12 US$20,000 |
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Bangalore International School
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| Geddalahalli,
Hennur Bagalur Road, Kothanur Post, Bangalore,
560077, India |
| Tel
: |
(+91) 912
846 5059/5060 |
| Fax : |
(+91) 912 846 5059 |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
3-17 |
| Total Enrolment: |
140; 68 boys, 72 girls |
| Fees: |
Day only -INR 20000-INR
42000 |
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| Calcutta International
School Society |
| 18 Lee Road,
Calcutta, 700 020, India |
| Tel
: |
(+91) 33 2247
9131 |
| Fax : |
(+91) 33 2280 3258 |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
4-18 |
| Total Enrolment: |
492; 237 boys, 255 girls |
| Fees: |
Day only -INR 13800-INR
19800 |
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| Canadian School
of India |
| 14/1 Kodigehalli
Main Road, Sahakar Nagar, Bangalore, 560 092,
India |
| Tel
: |
(+91) 80 2343
8414 |
| Fax : |
(+91) 80 2343 6488 |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
2.5-19 |
| Total Enrolment: |
233 |
| Nationalities: |
28 |
| Day: |
83 boys, 89 girls |
| Boarding: |
46 boys, 15 girls |
| Boarding: |
61 |
| Day: |
172 |
| Fees: |
Day only -US$ 4000-US$
6200
Boarding -US$ 3000-US$ |
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| Hebron School |
| Lushington
Hall, Ootacamund, Nilgiri Hills, Tamil Nadu,
643001, India |
| Tel
: |
(+91) 423
442372/442587 |
| Fax : |
(+91) 423 442195 |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
5-18 |
| Total Enrolment: |
598; 185 boys, 154 girls |
| Fees: |
Day only -US$ 1000-US$
6600
Boarding -US$ 1450-US$ 5800 |
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| India International
School |
| Gurukul Marg,
SFS, Mansarovar, Jaipur, 302 020, India |
| Tel
: |
(+91) 141
239 7906/7/8 |
| Fax : |
(+91) 141 239 5494 |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
4-18 |
| Total Enrolment: |
2000; 1210 boys, 790 girls |
| Nationalities: |
7 |
| Play School
(KG): |
107 |
| Primary: |
708 |
| Middle: |
527 |
| Secondary: |
340 |
| Higher Secondary: |
318 |
| Fees: |
Day only -INR 12900-INR
14600 |
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International School of Hyderabad
|
| 6-3-346 Road
# 1, Banjara Hills, Hyderabad, Andhra Pradesh,
500 034, India |
| Tel
: |
(+91) 40 2335
1110 |
| Fax : |
(+91) 40 2339 5065 |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
3-18 |
| Total Enrolment: |
55; 25 boys, 30 girls |
| Nationalities: |
11 |
| Nursery/Pre-School: |
7 |
| Primary School: |
34 |
| High School: |
14 |
| Fees: |
Day only -US$ 4800-US$
5700 |
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| Kodaikanal International
School |
| PO Box 25,
Kodaikanal, 624101 TN, India |
| Tel
: |
(+91) 4542
41104/5/6/7/8 |
| Fax : |
(+91) 4542 41109/10 |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
4-19 |
| Total Enrolment: |
492 |
| Nationalities: |
24 |
| Day: |
63 boys, 63 girls |
| Boarding: |
211 boys, 155 girls |
| High: |
316 |
| Middle: |
93 |
| Elementary: |
83 |
| Fees: |
Day only -US$ 3300-US$
15000
Boarding -US$ 3700-US$ 15000 |
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Mahindra United World College of India
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| Post Office
Paud, Pune, 412108, India |
| Tel
: |
(+91) 2139
43263/4 |
| Fax : |
(+91) 2139 43260 |
| E mail: |
dwilkinson@muwci.net |
| Web site: |
http://www.muwci.net |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
16-20 |
| Total Enrolment: |
200; 0 boys, 0 girls |
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| Mallya Aditi
International School |
| Post Box No
6427, Yelahanka, 560 064, Bangalore, India |
| Tel
: |
(+91) 80 846
2508/856 0238 |
| Fax : |
(+91) 80 846 2506/7 |
| E mail: |
mais@aditiblr.org |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
5-18 |
| Total
Enrolment: |
489; 234 boys, 255 girls |
| Fees: |
Day only -US$ 10000-US$
11250 |
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| Mercedes Benz
International School |
| Bungalow 16,
Telco Senior Officers Housing Colony, Pimpri,
Pune, 411018, India |
| Tel
: |
(+91) 20 747
3688 |
| Fax : |
(+91) 20 747 3688 |
| E mail: |
mbisch@pn2.vsnl.net.in |
| Web site: |
http://www.ecis.org/mbis |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
2-16 |
| Nationalities: |
14 |
| Total Enrolment: |
57; 27 boys, 30 girls |
| Nursery: |
3 |
| Primary (PYP): |
24 |
| Secondary (MYP): |
30 |
| Fees: |
Day only -INR 192000-INR
475000 |
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Pathways World School
|
| 2 Sainik Farms,
New Delhi, 110062, India |
| Tel
: |
(+91) 11 685
0592-3 |
| Fax : |
(+91) 11 685 0591 |
| E mail: |
jstaylor@pathways.ac.in |
| Web site: |
http://www.pathways.ac.in |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
3-18 |
| Nationalities: |
0 |
| Total Enrolment: |
0 |
| Fees: |
Day only -US$ 2000-US$
3500
Boarding -US$ 4500-US$ 5500 |
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| The British School |
| San Martin
Marg, Chanakyapuri, New Delhi, 110021, India |
| Tel
: |
(+91) 11 410
2183/467 8524 |
| Fax : |
(+91) 11 611 2363 |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
4-18 |
| Nationalities: |
49 |
| Total Enrolment: |
526; 287 boys, 239 girls |
| Primary School: |
204 |
| Senior School: |
237 |
| 'A' level programme: |
85 |
| Fees: |
Day only -INR 87000-INR
160000 |
|
| The International
School Bangalore |
| NAFL Valley,
Whitefield-Sarjapur Road, Near Dommasandra
Circle, Bangalore, 562 125, Karnataka, India |
| Tel
: |
(+91) 80 782
2550 |
| Fax : |
(+91) 80 782 2553 |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
4-18 |
| Nationalities: |
49 |
| Total Enrolment: |
660; 230 boys, 190 girls |
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Top
Woodstock School
|
| Mussoorie,
Uttaranchal, 248 179, India |
| Tel
: |
(+91) 135
632610/547/421/622 |
| Fax : |
(+91) 135 632885 |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
3-18 |
| Nationalities: |
21 |
| Total Enrolment: |
450 |
| Day: |
32 boys, 34 girls |
| Boarding: |
196 boys, 188 girls |
| Fees: |
Boarding -US$ 9950-US$
11100 |
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| Ecole Française
Internationale |
| 51- K Bhulabhai
Desai Road - Sham Nivas Colony - 400026 Bombay,
India |
| Tel
: |
(91) 22 2367
39 41 / 54 |
| Fax : |
(91) 22 2364 93 08 |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
2-11 |
| Total Enrolment: |
14 |
| Fees: |
Boarding - 3 689 _ - 6
280 _ |
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| Ecole Française |
| 2 Aurangzeb
Road - - New Delhi 110011, India |
| Tel
: |
(91) 11 3201
71 38 |
| Fax : |
(91) 11 2379 45 95 |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
2,5-17 |
| Total Enrolment: |
201 |
| Fees: |
Boarding -2 210 _ -4 299
_ |
|
| Lycée
Français |
| 12 rue Victor
Simonel - BP 35 - Pondichéry 605 001,
India |
| Tel
: |
(91) 413 33
40 96 |
| Fax : |
(91) 413 33 42 65 |
| ENROLMENT: |
| Age Range: |
3-18 |
| Total Enrolment: |
1168 |
| Fees: |
Boarding -340 _ - 575
_ |
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| Culture Shock |
|
Culture shock is an integral part of relocating;
everyone suffers from it to some extent. The term
'Culture Shock' can be misleading, as it is not
only the different culture of the host country
that can be unsettling. Instead of the label culture
shock, try considering the phrase, 'stress and
anxiety resulting from unfamiliar surroundings'.
When moving abroad, not only the predominant culture
of the people and city around you changes, there
is often a lifestyle change for the family too:
apartment living instead of a house with a garden,
a private school instead of a state school, increase
in disposable income, domestic staff being employed
in the home, only one parent working. Even if
you can buy recognizable and favorite food items
in the host country, there are likely to be changes
to taste, quality and price due to local climatic
conditions, production and preparation methods
and the cost of importing. These lifestyle changes
can be as difficult for a family to adapt to as
the cultural changes. The change in environment
can lead children to become depressed, anxious,
unhappy, badly behaved and physically ill. Advance
preparation and introduction to the likely changes
will mean that they are less surprising and ultimately
less problematic. Introducing A New Country As
Your Future Home
The best way to introduce children successfully
to something new is to make it exciting. The following
ideas can be used to prepare your children for
an international move:
Top
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Show them
picture books, videos and travel brochures
about the destination country. |
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Take them to restaurants
that serve the food of the country you are
going to |
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Introduce them to nationals
of the destination country at embassies, tourist
offices and ethnic restaurants. |
| |
Explain any anticipated
differences in lifestyle before the move. |
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Plan strategies for working
with the changes so their impact is positive
as much as possible. |
| |
Always try and convey
excitement about the move. |
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Once children have some
knowledge of where they are going and are
excited about a new experience they will be
more open to accepting the novelty and less
worried about the great unknown. |
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| Post Arrival
Strategies for Relieving Culture Shock |
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It is the
unfamiliar aspects of a country that prompt
the stresses of culture shock. For children
it can seem that everything is different and
unfamiliar. The language they hear around
them and the signs they see are likely to
be unintelligible. The buildings, shops, foods
and restaurants can all look strange too. |
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By finding familiar shops,
restaurants and foods, the enormity of the
differences will lessen for children. A visit
to McDonalds may not be top of the list for
adults as a place to eat in Paris, but for
children it can be a welcome reassurance that
everything they knew has not disappeared.
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Making contact with other
children who speak their language - preferably
those who like the country - will help children
settle too. A peer that children can communicate
with can help reduce loneliness and anxiety,
and provide explanations of and introductions
to the new culture. |
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Activities and sports
are useful for helping children settle in
a foreign country. Football, horse riding,
or any other activity that a child likes can
give them something to look forward to and
a place to make more friends, both local and
expatriate ones. Attending a specific group
activity eases the pressure of making friends,
by giving the child a reason for being part
of the group. It will also boost their confidence,
encourage them to find positive aspects of
the country and teach them, through host country
friends, how to make the most of the country
that is now home. |
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| Language |
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A major cause
of stress in a foreign country is the inability
to understand what is being said and written.
This lack of language skills can also make
it more difficult to appreciate how to successfully
live in a country. If the local language is
not being taught in the child's school, consider
private lessons. |
| |
Younger children pick
up a language by assimilation. If you have
local friends ask them to speak to young children
in the local language, especially if you expect
to be in the country for a few years. Continuous
exposure to the language will help the child
learn it and make their stay in the country
much less frustrating and much more enjoyable.
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| The Cycle of
Culture Shock |
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The effects
of culture shock usually fade over time, especially
with family support and encouragement to understand
the differences met during time spent in a
foreign country. Culture shock often follows
a pattern of Euphoria (initial enjoyment of
all the exciting new aspects of the country),
Depression (when the negative differences
overwhelm the positive ones) and Adaptation
(as adjustment to the country is made). The
time scale of this pattern varies for everyone
and not everyone experiences all three. The
most common time scale seems to be approximately
a week of Euphoria, a couple of months of
Depression and many months of Adaptation.
Many expats feel that the first year in a
country is one of ongoing adaptation and orientation. |
| |
However, culture shock
can be cyclical and expatriates find that
it recurs over time, especially at certain
times of year, no matter how long they stay
in a country. Special holidays or anniversaries
can reawaken aspects of culture shock and
spark depression and frustration years after
the move. |
| |
Children can experience this cycle too
and they need ongoing support from their
parents to benefit fully from the experience
of living abroad.
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